Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Never forget, that God isn't finished with me yet."
"During your life, never stop dreaming.
No one can take away your dreams"
"I'd rather die like a man, than live like a coward."
"We wouldn't ask why a rose that grew from the concrete for having damaged petals, in turn, we would all celebrate its tenacity, we would all love its will to reach the sun, well, we are the roses, this is the concrete and these are my damaged petals, dont ask me why, thank God and ask me how."
"My only fear of death is coming back reincarnated."
"To all the seeds that follow me
protect your essence
Born with less, but you still precious."
These are all the words of a man, misunderstood. This was a man who only wanted to come out of the life his circumstances borne him into. He loved art, and his creativity greatly surpassed that of his peers.
These are the words of Tupac Amaru Shakur who was born Lesane Parish Crooks. His mother was a paralegal and outstanding advocate for many Blacks in the Brooklyn, New York area.
HE was a visionary. Learn his life. Respect his art.
This upcoming year I will pray more, study the Word more, read more, love more, love more genuinely, guard my heart better, be honest more, save $ more, be more disciplined, be a better steward over what I've been entrusted with, trust God more, trust God with my whole heart, smile more, laugh more, give more of my possessions, give more of my time, give more of myself, tithe faithfully, live this life God has blessed me with more fully, visit friends more, study harder, sleep more (lol), hug more, show more kindness, give more of my time, and be more sociable.
[Longest sentence ever, right? :)]
The list may seem extensive, but it's all possible and it WILL all get done. I'm not promising any minimum amount of time or effort into any one resolution, but just committing to do more than I have been doing.
My final 'to do' is to refrain from making promises to myself, that I know I can't keep. Being realistic with myself is vital to being sincere with others.
I wish you an extraordinarily blessed new year full of God's PERFECT LOVE!!!!!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
You just woke up, and you just feel like today is going to be a wonderful day.
You roll out of bed and get fresh and clean for the day.
Your hair looks nice, and you smell extra good, because today is a special day.
Your cell phone rings. It’s your mom, and she wishes you a happy birthday.
Of course, it’s your birthday.
You expect this day to be special.
Now imagine that it’s a weekday, so you have obligations.
Your day has already been scripted. You only have left to follow that script that has been designed just for you.
You already know that so many people will call, text, and send you messages on facebook to remind you of how loved you are on your special day.
It’s 2 o’clock in the afternoon.
The day is flying by.
Your agenda had already warned you that it would be an oddly busy day.
Upon checking your phone, you learn that no one has called, neither has anyone sent you any text messages.
“Maybe they’ll call later” you convince yourself.
Everyone is obviously just as busy as you are.
There’s nothing wrong with that.
They’ll catch up with me later.
It’s 6 o’clock in the evening.
Your day is pretty much done in the way of obligations, and now its time to have fun.
You call your friends to see what type of mischief you all can get into that evening.
Each person you call already has plans!
What friends these are.
Your family members didn’t even leave free time in their schedules to spend with you.
It’s 9:45 at night.
You’re not really sleepy or tired, but there isn’t much else to do, but watch tv and go to be.
You decide to retire early, somberly disappointed by all the people that you thought cared about you, that let you down on the one day a year that you feel that you deserve at least a little attention.
How would you feel?
Now, think about all the Christmases you’ve celebrated.
Not only do we neglect to acknowledge December 25th as the Lord’s special day, but we even go as far as to exchange presents with friends and family members on this day.
Imagine how God must feel.
He may get a ‘Thank you’ or an ‘I love you’ but is that all He deserves on a day that is supposed to celebrate Him and His precious Son?
Let’s make this holiday season different from all the others.
Let’s use this time to bless God by showing love to those who are less fortunate.
There are children and families all over the world who can’t afford to be selfish over the holidays, because they don’t have the resources to do so.
In addition to blessing those who really only need prayer and love, bless those who can truly benefit from the fruit of your labor.
Have a wonderful holiday season of showing love and blessing those who are not as financially stable as you and your family.
Leviticus 23:22 Deuteronomy 15:11 Luke 14:12-14 Luke 12:33
Sunday, December 14, 2008
I appreciate the opportunity to call you friend.
There are over 6 billion people in this world, but God allowed me to be friends with you.
Have you ever thought about that?
Out of all the people in this world, there are certain people who are determined to hate you, there are others who are determined to love you and go out of their way to show you that love, and there are some people who couldn't care less about what happens to you.
Around you is a distinct network.
You almost have your own personal world.
In that world, you have people of all sizes and ages, and from all walks of life.
Your world has a nice mixture of personalities and characteristics.
This diverse, dynamic world is ever-expanding as you meet new people and as new lives are borne into the worlds of friends and loved ones.
The question is, how are you impacting the people in your world?
By what name do those people know you - grumpy, angry, wacky, discontent, unforgiving, rude, ungrateful, sweet, kind, thankful, humble, generous, compassionate, indifferent, selfish...the list is infinite?
Instead of passively allowing society and circumstances to impact you, actively decide what impact you will have on your immediate environment.
Live life; give love.
It's the most inexpensive gift you can give.
No Wal-Mart employee could possibly get trampled to death in customers' hot pursuit of a reasonable price on love.
It's an inherent, endless gift that we can give and give without ever concerning ourselves with whether we'll have enough to go around.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Have you ever considered your abilities insufficient for the task you’ve been given – like there are sooo many other people better-suited for the job?
You’re tip-toeing around the thought of whether God actually meant to choose you.
You, the young person who never did anything right, who never seemed to live up to the person(s) your parents wanted you to emulate, who never gave your WHOLE life to God before, who hasn’t truly trusted a person in years, who’s not quite sure he/she knows how to love with longevity, but who is ready to trust God like you never have before, who is ready to love God genuinely and lengthily like you never have before, and who knows it’s time to turn it all over to Him.
It’s time to turn it all over to the God who was there when you lost friends to the cunning, cold hand of death: the God who continues to reach for your WHOLE heart although you have tried up until recently to keep parts of it just beyond His reach, the God who has always provided for you, and who has been the only man to TRULY care for you and every minute thing that was remotely related to you.
What a Love that is!
You are tall enough.
God is there lifting you to reach the goals He has for you.
Thursday, December 4, 2008
I save them, and I look at them occasionally, when I need a smile or when I need to be reminded that there are people who truly, selflessly care about me.
I smile to myself when I think of the small things people do just to show their humanity.
I have a sincere yearning for helping people.
I genuinely believe that one person can make a difference in another person’s life.
I’m not talking an Oprah difference, but I am thinking of an Oprah act.
What I mean there is that a minute gesture of kindness can have an immeasurable impact.
I long for love.
The love that I have to give is extraordinary and peerless.
To me, there’s no earthly love like the love I’m willing to give.
My only condition is that I receive that love in return.
For family and friends, I don’t mind if they don't equally reciprocate the love I show them, but the standard for the man with whom I’ll spend my remaining days is much higher.
On family: yes, they are my own blood, but they have their own households and their own families to maintain and show concern towards.
On friends: they have their own affairs and their own families. The only non-emotional link I have with friends is common interests, which is not exactly tantamount to genetic similarities.
It seems like the men I’ve recently encountered (I should just say man, because I’m actually only referring to my ex) want the sacrifice and the unconditional love they’re not willing to give themselves.
That’s just not for me.
I don’t want a man who accepts and embraces everything I am, without making sure I at least know and understand him in return.
That’s just not good enough.
Me and this heart of mine, we’re fragile.
We have become resilient over the years, but we just wish the emotional resilience we've developed wasn’t so necessary for survival in this world.
We patiently, but eagerly await our other half, anticipating the great victory of overcoming this insatiable yearning for compatibility.
We don’t know ourselves like God knows us, but as far as our meager understanding is concerned, we are ready for love.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Try to look past the horrible examples which have been set before you.
Try not to let the subversive Christians you've encountered, impact the perfection the Lord embodies.
Think about the sacrifices, think about the humility, think about the lifestyle, think about the love – think about the word's connotation.
From my actions, I can tell you what others may think it means…
”Oh, well it must mean indulging in your most basic desires without going 'too far'.”
“It must mean doing any- and everything except killing people, stealing, etc; you know, anything for which you could possibly be imprisoned.”
“Maybe it means appearing to be nice and sweet to others, while doing whatever you’d like behind closed doors.”
“Or maybe it means going to church, and participating in other religious activities, while still maintaining the entirety of your own individualism.”
In reality, being a Christian is something completely different.
Being a Christian means living love.
It means loving humanity enough to sacrifice yourself, your lifestyle, and your possessions, to draw those who are lost.
Being a Christian means making the ultimate sacrifice.
It doesn’t necessarily mean forsaking what distinguishes you from everyone else, but it does mean using those distinctions to serve God.
Ultimately, it is redefining the value you have as a person – trading what the world values in and about you for what God deems invaluable in and about you.
Now, beyond defining 'being a Christian', the true task is living it.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Love is this nebulous notion of extreme emotion.
It makes people do things completely uncharacteristic of themselves.
It makes people care, it makes people question their existence, it makes people question their purpose, it just makes people...
What is this thing called love?
How can something so abstract have such an impact on beings so far up the ladder of intelligent beings?
We even beat out cock roaches, ants, and chimpanzees.
How is it that something intangible can have so much control over us -
we are intelligent beings, who have evolved to withstand certain pathogens and infectious agents, we've made great discoveries and phenomenal scientific advances, we've created machines to do everything save thinking for us, but we can't do anything about love.
All we can do is succumb to its infinite power.
It alters our senses - makes food tasteless, sounds inaudible, sights invisible, and thoughts valueless.
It makes us zombies, walking in a straight line, arms outstretched before us, searching for love.
Love is greater than humanity.
Lucky for us, it has survived time, and even the most sordid events.
Unlike us, it needn't evolve to survive; it simply survives.
It seems so simple, somewhat mundane and insignificant, but don't tell love that.
When disrespected, love can leave you in quite the bond.
I find it so humorous that human beings think themselves superior to everything, yet love has us all under her foot - lifting and moving us like puppets.
We are but slaves to this thing called love.
Try, just try to control love.
Try to categorize it, and group it alongside some other emotion.
Please indulge me with the details of the turnout.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
...like, there has to be more to life than where you are and what you're doing.
Have you ever wondered what else could be done;
what more you could do with your talents and your unique abilities?
You are an individual.
There are specific things that you can do, that no one else on this earth can do.
The combination of talents and abilities that coalesce to form the intricacies of your existence, make you incomparable to any other person on this earth.
Your desires, your thoughts, your words, your form of expression, you mindset, your goals, you style, your sense of humor, your knowledge-base, your expertise, your beliefs - its all you.
These comprise the rudiment of your being.
You are who you are - not to be overlooked or underestimated, but to be exalted as an individual person.
The characteristics that distinguish one person from another are what make us alive.
They make us human.
Out ability to love, our ability to create, our ability to envision, our ability to dream makes us extraordinary.
Cast aside any desires to mesh with the crowd.
Abort any thoughts that nurture the notion of detesting difference.
God (yes, God) has made each of us different.
Your decision to believe or disbelieve this doesn't alter its truthfulness.
Embrace your differences.
Understand that God has created you with these distinct characteristics for a distinct reason.
To know your true purpose, to understand why you are, you must seek Him.
He does have the all the answers.
As mere humans, our knowledge has limits, our perspective has limits, and our understanding has limits.
Humble yourself under the Mighty Hand of the One, Who, even His boundlessness is infinite.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
It's 12am on [date]
I'm at [internship location] lying in my bed, staring into the darkness
and I just let go.
It just hit me.
I wasn't surprised.
I was actually in denial (yeah, big surprise, huh?).
"We'll stay in touch."
"We're still 'good' friends."
"He doesn't really like her."
What was I thinking?
Even you can see that none of that stuff was true.
We were great together.
He was so so right for me.
some things about him differed from me,
but so what!!
I didn't want a reflection of myself
I wanted my other half.
What's wrong with me?!
I had 'em.
He had me.
I messed up.
I really messed up.
One of those mistakes that doesn't just go away.
It doesn't just scar you for life,
It haunts you for life.
I'll always wonder what would've happened,
but I don't think I'll ever know for sure.
See, I didn't use 'never.'
I didn't say,
'But I will never know for sure.'
I'm trying to preserve my last bit of hope.
I actually already do wonder
how it would have been.
What it would be like to be his.
How we would be together,
how the we would affect our individual lives - relationships with God, school, and family.
None of that matters now, though.
At least not to me.
It matters to the lovely young lady with whom he has chosen to spend his time.
I forgot her name.
She has to be someone special
to have the privilege of being his girl;
but at the same time,
she doesn't deserve him.
Nothing she could do or say
would make her deserve him,
because no one really deserves him.
We ladies can only be ourselves
that we are remotely worthy
to walk at his side,
to be graced by the wonderful man that he is,
to be called
Maybe its true that if the same words were spoken by a stranger they wouldn't have such a severe sting.
Maybe it hurts so badly because it comes from someone you supposedly trust; someone you would never intentionally hurt.
Because of the type of person you are, you would never spew verbal abuse.
You would never use hurtful words to entertain some at the expense of one.
You wouldn't even reciprocate the harsh revilement of which you are periodically victim.
You would never purpose to be the cause of someone else's pain.
Since you would never purpose to bring someone else pain and embarrassment, why do people put so much effort into bringing those things upon you?
What have you done to deserve such taunting and disdain?
that's no friend at all.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Where would we be without pain?
Where would we be without the defining moments that are those difficult decisions and seemingly insurmountable issues?
What type of person is shaped from a mold that strictly follows the perfect blueprint to greatness – a mold that has never been tested for strength and ability to withstand pressure?
It seems as though the outcome, regardless of the composition or type of mold (i.e. regardless of the person), would be a pansy.
Maybe my perception is constricted by exposure deprivation, but I’ve never know pansies to have a reputation of resilience; they’re know for their instability and ‘softness’.
It’s the sissy of flowers.
Think back to an obstacle in your life’s progression.
How did that obstacle affect you?
How did you react to that change in pace?
Did you ignore the event, because that was the only way for you to cope with it?
Did you learn a valuable lesson about yourself or about life?
Did you apply the lesson-learned to a similar situation encountered at a later time?
Your answers to these questions reveal a great deal about you, and your outlook on life.
I believe a great differentiating factor amongst mankind is how people react to life’s obstacles.
You can’t judge a pedophile, murderer, thief, or Enron executive for how they’ve reacted to hard times in their lives.
Some people just haven’t learned the varying situations they may encounter, and the appropriate ways to address each of those situations.
Use what life hands you, because you never know who admires you, and who has chosen you as their person to emulate.
Of course, you shouldn’t live your life for others, but you should live as the example you’ve inevitably become.
In today’s society, youth need examples.
Be that example.
It’s selfish to neglect the role you hold in society as the example to those who are to follow, just to ‘be your own person.’
Life is about what and how much you’re willing to give – that includes how much of yourself.
Remember, you reap what you sow.Be an exemplary model for those who need one, and in the days when your children will seek advice from their peers and not their parents, they’ll have the equivalent of the example you became for someone else.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Will our country be bequeathed to the oldest person to be sworn in for his first term, or the first African American candidate?
Will racism and perceived inexperience prevail over a wistful yearning for change?
This election has been a pivotal one in that it has resurrected memories of historical events that many considered permanently buried in a deep grave of equality and civil rights.
I've seen more racism and hate in the news and in the eyes of strangers in the past few months than I've ever seen in my life.
Tonight will be an evening filled with emotion.
Supporters of the losing candidate will be enraged, while supporters of the winner will be elated.
My hopes are that events remain at a controlled, safe level.
Regardless of the outcome (I've already voted, and there's really nothing more that I can do), I am eagerly awaiting the end of this election, because the commotion that has accompanied it has been extremely exorbitant.
Tonight is the night.
Obama or McCain, tonight is the night.
Monday, November 3, 2008
1. Take at least 2 trips whose destinations lie outside the continental US.
2. Rock climb
3. Get a pet (it has to be able to respire and digest - no rocks or plants allowed)
4. Read 50 books on any subject (cover to cover, no skipping around)
5. Go to a ballroom dancing competition
6. Get at least 50 pages into my book
7. Score at least 30 on the MCAT or 1300 on the GRE
8. Apply to 8 MD programs or Grad programs
9. Buy a new car (this is extremely difficult considering my allergies to saving $$)
10. Have a child
11. Just kidding!!!!
12. Each month try at least one recipe representing a different country
13. Read my Bible daily (daring, I know)
14. Stay single, and focused on me (unless God intervenes)
15. Accumulate 250 volunteer hours
16. Save $3 grand
17. Ride a mechanical bull
18. Take a dancing class.
I think that's it for now....but the list grows often, so ya gotta keep up!